Zen And The Art Of Obtaining A Motorcycle License The Easy Way
There are two ways to get your motorcycle license in Wisconsin. Well, actually three. The first one is to buy a motorcycle and ride it around - on your farm, presumably, or any other personal expanse of non-public roads you may own - until you're ready to pass the road test, which involves someone following you around in a car with a two-way radio and watching your every move. Note: This also involves spending a fair amount of your day with the usual representative cross-section of society at the DMV.
The second way is to take a Motorcycle Safety Foundation basic skills class, which is usually around eighty bucks and five nights at your local community college. With this option, all you have to do at the DMV is hand over your diploma and twenty bucks. These classes are always jammed, as you might expect, because most people choose this option. Except for those who go with option three, which is to get your six-month temps and then renew it every May for thirty years.
I chose option two. Ironically, i am actually trying to sell my motorcycle at the moment. This is because we're moving to Florida in two weeks and we need the money. Anyone you know need a CB750 Nighthawk? But i digress. In any case, i spent last night riding in circles around orange traffic cones, developing my state-sanctioned cornering skills. It's great fun, and for several reasons. Not just because you get to ride in circles around orange traffic cones, but because it's such a perfect study in gender-affected group dynamics as well. If you're male, you almost feel the need to swagger a bit, spread your shoulders a little, on your first day of a motorcycle class. No matter that you're in a classroom. You have to establish that you belong in the cult.
You'd think this would be negated by the fact that everyone in the room should be a beginner (theoretically, that is, except for the two-thirds of us who have already been owning and riding on the downhill side of legal for several years). But no. I think it's because the ability to ride a motorcycle is one of those things that seems almost a native skill of manhood. Like throwing a spiral, or changing your spark plugs. If you have to learn, well, it's way too late for you. Funny. There were women in the room, too, but in contrast to the rest of us, they seemed totally at ease. You have to appreciate the irony. Susan Faludi was way ahead of us.
p.s. Faludi's "Stiffed" is one of the most amazing books i've read, since you asked. "Tour de force" does not do that book justice. John Gray is an idiot.
p.p.s. John Gray was an idiot even before.
p.p.p.s. One of my more entertaining psych professors used to wonder aloud which planet John Gray was from if Mars and Venus were already taken.
p.p.p.p.s. Hint: It's close to Neptune.
p.p.p.p.p.s. Heh heh.
The second way is to take a Motorcycle Safety Foundation basic skills class, which is usually around eighty bucks and five nights at your local community college. With this option, all you have to do at the DMV is hand over your diploma and twenty bucks. These classes are always jammed, as you might expect, because most people choose this option. Except for those who go with option three, which is to get your six-month temps and then renew it every May for thirty years.
I chose option two. Ironically, i am actually trying to sell my motorcycle at the moment. This is because we're moving to Florida in two weeks and we need the money. Anyone you know need a CB750 Nighthawk? But i digress. In any case, i spent last night riding in circles around orange traffic cones, developing my state-sanctioned cornering skills. It's great fun, and for several reasons. Not just because you get to ride in circles around orange traffic cones, but because it's such a perfect study in gender-affected group dynamics as well. If you're male, you almost feel the need to swagger a bit, spread your shoulders a little, on your first day of a motorcycle class. No matter that you're in a classroom. You have to establish that you belong in the cult.
You'd think this would be negated by the fact that everyone in the room should be a beginner (theoretically, that is, except for the two-thirds of us who have already been owning and riding on the downhill side of legal for several years). But no. I think it's because the ability to ride a motorcycle is one of those things that seems almost a native skill of manhood. Like throwing a spiral, or changing your spark plugs. If you have to learn, well, it's way too late for you. Funny. There were women in the room, too, but in contrast to the rest of us, they seemed totally at ease. You have to appreciate the irony. Susan Faludi was way ahead of us.
p.s. Faludi's "Stiffed" is one of the most amazing books i've read, since you asked. "Tour de force" does not do that book justice. John Gray is an idiot.
p.p.s. John Gray was an idiot even before.
p.p.p.s. One of my more entertaining psych professors used to wonder aloud which planet John Gray was from if Mars and Venus were already taken.
p.p.p.p.s. Hint: It's close to Neptune.
p.p.p.p.p.s. Heh heh.
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